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E. A.'s avatar

100% of the fault of abuse, belongs to the abuser.

100 fucking percent.

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Randi Corrigan's avatar

Wow, what an incredible article. I was not aware of your childhood trauma, and I am so sorry to hear that. The connection made to the entitlement of the person in authority to abuse us- and how the government is currently our abuser is spot on. I am too struggling at this point to see the good in humanity during his current administrations abhorrent behaviors.

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Lilith Helstrom's avatar

Yes and maybe this will sound weird, but that feeling is very similar to what I experienced in childhood while being abused by my Mom. Her hurting me and no one rescuing me from it made me see humanity as cruel and untrusting.

I regularly see similarities in my experiences as an abused child and our experiences being stuck under a fascist dictatorship.

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Randi Corrigan's avatar

That doesn't sound weird at all. It must be extremely infuriating to be abused by the person who is supposed to keep you safe and having no one rescue you. Similar to this administration, there is a covert but global gaslighting in which everyone's silence and/or complicity in this authoritarian regime is denying our very harsh reality. As defeated as I have been feeling, me must continue to use our voices. We will not be silenced by others who are in denial. I also find comfort in engaging with like minded and insightful individuals like you.

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Rhymes With "Brass Seagull"'s avatar

Very true indeed

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Jonathan Harvey's avatar

An autobiographical digression.

They say a child can be more(!) confused if a parent oscillates between authentic kindness and abusive behavior then if the parent is consistently abusive. I would say this was true in my case.

My parents were both liberal stray sheep from conservative families, but my father's relationship with his parents was far more toxic than in my mother's case.

The tragedy of my father is that he earnestly yearned and aspired to be a better father than his own was to him but...he did not know how!!!! These things can go on through multiple generations.

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Fiona Grayson's avatar

Well said, though I have an inclination to want to rename this "All Evangelicals Hate Human Rights". Though, to be fair, the Venn Diagram between Republicans and evangelicals is mostly a circle.

Thank you for sharing your story with us. I know it's not easy to be vulnerable like that. I'm so sorry this happened to you.

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Claire Davis's avatar

Lilith, as usual this is an incredibly well-written and deeply insightful article 🩵 You did such an amazing job applying the powerful words your therapist once told you to the macro-level governmental abuse of people who have been incarcerated. You made a ton of really true and important points. It was really sickening to read those accounts of the extremely inhumane treatment of prisoners and I hope that as a society, we can band together and fight back against that horrific injustice.

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Regina's avatar

We are also suffering mental abuse by what the government is doing to immigrants, much as in a family when kids have to experience the abuse of their siblings.

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Rhymes With "Brass Seagull"'s avatar

It's always the reddest of red flags whenever someone says something to the effect of "I don't believe in human rights", or more commonly, cringing and changing the subject whenever the overall concept comes up in conversation.

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